Oswald Spengler predicted a long winter in The Decline of The West. Spengler was not alone in his depiction of a dystopian society where fashion reigns over utility, luck rules, bureaucracy stifles progress, and the wealthy hold the reins of a fledgling global culture. Spengler was one of the first to be taken seriously.
Stewie’s Guide to WORLD DOMINATION [sic] It is a ray of sunshine for a winter day of our decadence. In Spengler’s seasonal taxonomy of decline, winter is the final phase. Spengler writes that one sign of a culture in winter is an increasingly authoritarian government. In an authoritarian government, clearly expressing your perception is not a fiscally sustainable option.
“…if I were to confess that I know the whole enterprise is a sham, then that delicious stream of cold cash that appears under my pillow after the loss of a tooth suddenly cuts off, doesn’t it? ”
–Stewie Griffin
Transcribed by Steve Callaghan
Spengler separates culture from civilization. Yes, the two are intertwined, but culture reflects people, while civilization reflects aspirations for global domination, requiring increasingly authoritarian leaders who represent power rather than being powerful themselves. A culture of war masquerades as fashion and subverts education into a specialized academic philosophy at obvious discrepancies with reality.
Stewie says that the foundation of American education, the three Rs, does not represent the three Rs: reading, writing, and arithmetic. Stewie suggests that we might be better served by the acronym WAR.
“There is no country that loves ‘WAR more than ours…blame it on the Boss Hoggs of the world who got the whole company off on the wrong foot with this ‘three R’s’ nonsense.”
–Stewie Griffin
Spengler predicted a focus on lavish sports entertainment as the final signs of the closure of culture and the domination of civilization, where work loses meaning for the wealthy as sports become the surrogate for meaning in one’s life. . Stewie deftly reveals these two signs at once as he analyzes a typical civilization workplace.
“You’re rotting your brain…you find yourself having to ask and then alternately answer the terribly probing and provocative question, ‘Did you have a good weekend?’ forty-seven different times. And let’s face it: even though most answers should fall along the lines of: ‘Well, I spent most of Saturday and Sunday trying to ignore loveless marriage and spoiled brats that I’ve surrounded myself… as I’ve been soothed by the narcotic of NFL football to avoid pondering the real possibility that I might be gay.'”
–Stewie Griffin
Stewie is a ray of light that warms our winter day. Spengler argues that winter is devoid of symbolic art. In the winter of a civilization, art is replaced by nonsensical fashion dialogue. Stewie avoids the nonsense of our encroaching civilization by spreading symbolic art about our civilization in Stewie’s Guide to WORLD DOMINATION, helped print by Steve Callaghan; Perennial Currents, 2006.