In the New Year, divorcing couples who can do so amicably can use mediation to make the dissolution process much less contentious. This process is much more attractive than a long and protracted court battle. Mediation not only eliminates unnecessary stress, but also saves money and time. For many, it’s more of a team concept of both spouses, a mediator, and a few sessions to work out the details of the divorce.
A mediator will provide guidance in reaching a resolution on issues that still need to be resolved. They bring critical negotiation skills to listen to the interests and concerns of each party and then help find a common resolution that each person can accept. The mediator is a neutral party and often an attorney, so they will be able to provide you with background on what is legally permissible. When a dead end is reached or progress is halted by negativity, the mediator knows how to get the conversation back on track. For some couples this means not doing mediation in one day. But in two or three sessions, you can solve all the big dissolution priorities.
It is important that you know what your future needs are so that child support, spousal support, and the division of property and debt are done to help you find as stable a future as possible. What many people like about mediation is that it allows you to express your values and opinions. A contested divorce, by contrast, follows a stricter formula and what some call a “one size fits all” approach. Mediation is more sensitive for two adults who can be in the same room together and discuss the details. You can take into account the budgets you live with every day and the future needs that you and the children will have. Mediators also know how to look for tax savings and alternative settlement options to increase your chances of financial stability after divorce.
Couples who have gone through a mediated divorce say it is much better for two people who know their finances and assets intimately to decide how to dissolve the marriage rather than a judge or a couple of lawyers. At the end of the mediation process, the courts will create and approve a final divorce agreement. Months later, you will thank yourself for doing the mediation. The money you save can go towards the children, a savings or emergency fund, or settling into a new home.